If you, or they tried to start the car a ton of times and didn't let the starter cool, it very well could have fried.
If they didn't replace the starter for you - good, I as well as many others can sell you a decent used one for about $45 + shipping, and its not that hard to change...
Now on to the starting problem.
Do you have a volt meter? You said you tested some stuff so I assume you do.
Put the + probe on the battery + terminal, then the -probe onto the engine block and see what voltage you have.
Then do the same except put the - probe onto a strut tower nut in the engine bay - if the voltages are pretty close (like 12.5 and 12.4) your ok, but if they are off (like 10.1 and 12.5) then you have a grounding problem.
What happened when the ECU relay went bad? Whats the story behind that? Also - check
www.se-r.net or search here - there is a way to run diagnostics on the car, have you done that to check for any error codes?
Best of luck
Chris